The Unloveliest Bride Made Lovely by the Love of the Greatest Lover

A dear friend wanted something to include in a congratulatory greeting to a loved one who is getting married. The loved one is in bondage to a legalistic cult, so I suggested that I might write an explanation of the last half of Ephesians 5 that would not only be helpful for the marriage, but might present Christ's love, life, death, and life again--all for the ungodly. Thinking that it might be of help to more than just this one couple, I include the note below.

If we want to be wise (v15) in evil days (v16), not foolish (v17) or out of control (v18a) but rather controlled by the Spirit (v18b), then that which most moves us should be God’s words (v19-20), to which we all submit when addressed by one another with them (v21).

This submission takes on a special form toward husbands (v21-33), parents (6:1-4), and bosses (6:5-9). This note is primarily concerned with what it looks like in marriage.

5:22 tells us the style of the submission and the object of the submission. Wives’ submission to their husbands is to be like their submission to Christ, because it is to be part of their submission to Christ.

This is why when a husband doesn’t turn out to be all you had hoped (1Pet 3:1), you can still submit (1Pet 3:1-4a), because your audience is God Himself (1Pet 3:4b). God never fails to be all you had hoped and more.

Marriage imitates the relationship between Jesus and the church (v23), and the wife must submit to Him who has taken her for His body and saved her.

Just like we don’t submit to Christ only in some areas, and refuse to obey Him in others, so also a husband’s authority over his wife applies to every part of life (v24). Do not withhold yourself from him and so corrupt the image that marriage is intended to be.

But, those who know the Lord Jesus much prefer to think upon Him, and what He is like, which makes studying the husband’s part (v25-33) much more pleasant to us.

Just as the good wife submits in all areas to her husband, the good husband expends his entire self for his wife (v25). He does not do this grudgingly or out of mere duty, but out of love. The command is not “give yourselves up for your wives,” although that is surely a part of it. It is “love your wives, as Christ loved the church”—and for that reason and in that way, give yourself up for her.

What is glorious is when we begin to think about for what kind of wife Christ did this. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Rom 5:8). While we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son (Rom 5:10).

In other words, although the husband of a good wife may expend himself for his wife as v25 commands, it is the husband of the treacherous and unworthy wife who has the best opportunity to fulfill the analogy. This banishes once and for all, all excuses of whether one’s wife “qualifies” for the kind of self-sacrifice that is commanded here.

But this is not a one-day, one-time self-giving merely to deliver His bride from peril. His aim is not merely at saving us from one peril; but rather, that He would make us completely perfect. He gives Himself up (v25) to claim the privilege of sanctifying us (v26a), using His Word constantly to bathe us until we are not just unspotted and wrinkle-free and unblemished (27b) but indeed splendid (27a).

Again, it is not merely the action (nourish) that is in view but the affection (cherish) that drives it (v29a). This is not only a to-do list for the husband, but a how-and-why-to-do list. Husbands shall love their wives (v28).

Why? What is at stake here? v32 lets us in on a startling mystery: Genesis 2:24 (Eph 5:31) is primarily about Christ and the church (cf. 29b-30). This is what is at stake in every husband’s conduct. This is what should be on display in every marriage.

Jesus gave Himself for an unlovely bride, not because she had potential, but because He intended to make Her lovely Himself. A godly husband is an illustration of the glorious gospel. And, having such an eternal husband as Christ enables every Christian wife to submit to her husband, whether he is worthy of it or not.

Delight in the Lord's Day

If you turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy day of the LORD, honourable, and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: then shalt thou delight thyself in the LORD; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father: for the mouth of the LORD has spoken it. –Isaiah 58:13–14

 

Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work: but the seventh day is the sabbath of the LORD thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates: for in six days the LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the LORD blessed the sabbath day, and hallowed it. –Exodus 20:8–11

 

Revelation 1:10 states, “I was in the Spirit on the Lord’s Day.” John was speaking of the first day of the week, the day we know as Sunday when we gather in our local churches to worship the Lord just as the apostles did on the first day of the week (Acts 20:7). But the Lord’s Day is so much more than going to church. The Lord’s Day is that day when our souls are nourished by the pure milk of the Word of God. Jesus speaks directly to us! 

 

In the twenty-first century, there seems to be widespread thought that the command to keep the Lord’s Day holy is a heavy burden (Ex. 20:8–11). To some it has become the forgotten commandment and is perceived as simply another legalistic regulation. Happily, the Lord created the Lord’s Day to bless man, not to oppress him (Mark 2:27). This day is a blessed day, a happy day, a joyful day, a glad day; not one of oppression but one of freedom in the Lord, for He has said, “Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.” If the church and our own souls are to flourish unto holiness, then we must actively learn to delight in the Lord's Day. 

You can find the rest of this article here. 

This article first appeared in Puritan Reformed Journal. Volume 3, Number 2. July 2011. Puritan Reformed Theological Seminary. Grand Rapids, page 341-350 and is used with their permission.

The Problem with Pietism

It commends a half-religion, which is another name for idolatry and paganism
The big problem with pietism is simply that it is only a half-faith. It tries to receive God's promises as from the Almighty, and yet it does not receive God's commands as from the Almighty.

So pietism is a half-faith in a half-God that leads to a half-Christian life. The problem with that is that the Bible tells us that half-faith is false religion, and that a half-God is actually and idolatrous caricature and not the true and living God, and half-obedience is disobedience.

It contradicts the most basic Scriptural teaching about the Christian life
When we learn that 1Cor 10:31 intentionally uses the most mundane things--eating and drinking--to instruct us in what the divinely blessed life is, then we are prepared to brush teeth, sweep floors, and yes proclaim the gospel and sing praise... all to the glory of God.

It contradicts the most basic elements of what we confess Scripture to teach
Our catechism's first question and answer encapsulate this well: the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever. This is not just our "primary purpose" as some contemporary wordings have tried to say it. It is the "controlling purpose"--the chief that commands the purpose--in absolutely everything that we do.

So, God has not given us a single thing to do, except that it must be done unto His glory. And, God has not given us a single thing to do, except that we must do it in enjoyment of Him.

It confuses poor theology students into downplaying the importance of exercises of piety
Now, please be cautious. Do not throw out biblical piety--and a strong devotion to the exercises of piety--as you reject an unbiblical pietism. There is hardly anything that God commands more than the exercises of piety. The first four commandments--and especially the first and the fourth--strongly stress this piety.

Communion with God continually and daily and weekly, in the assembly and family and privately, are everywhere commanded in the Bible. If these are not the life-breath of our existence, and the hinges upon which our days and weeks and lives turn, then we shall not be pious in any activity whatsoever.

On Reconstructing Antinomianism

An Accusation and a Response

Over at the "gospel" coalition, Tullian Tchividjian has written an article called "Deconstructing Moralism." It is the latest salvo in a series of attacks that basically communicate that those who preach the law just don't get grace. This is an astounding accusation, and you can read my comment on that blog post to see my response to it.

Confusing Rhetoric, with Real-Life Consequences

Having responded there to that accusation, I hope to borrow your eyes and mind for a few moments to consider the danger of the theology behind the accusation. I know of at least two truly converted believers who came under such preaching and learned to call themselves "legalists" and tried to "repent" of loving God's law, thinking much about it, or trying hard to keep it. One of them has escaped. The other continues under that preaching and is sadly confused. This is one of the reasons why the Bible pronounces woe upon them who say that what is good is really evil.

A Question of Trusting God

May the Lord grant to us to trust that His law is good, just as is His gospel, and that He uses both.

The law cannot save, and it cannot power sanctification. But it is a false pragmatism to say that since it can do neither of these things, we should be careful not to give it much place in our preaching. God certainly gives it much place in His Word!

Demonstrating that Trusting Our Own Wisdom Doesn't Work

A little reflection will demonstrate that it is pragmatically suicidal to try to preach only gospel and not law:

One of the main problems with the new antinomianism is that genuinely converted Christians don't to know what to do with themselves under such preaching. They hear from the pulpit that thinking upon the law is useless or even dangerous, and that we should just trust that thinking upon the gospel will accomplish everything by itself.

But they find that it is true that it is no longer they who live but Christ who lives in them, and that this Christ, who now lives in them, loves the law--loves to keep it. He loves to exert Himself (and to exert ourselves as His own body) in keeping it. He loves to meditate upon it. He wrote Psalm 119, and He meant it. And now He has written it on believers' hearts.

And of course, the truly unconverted person cannot repent and believe for salvation, if he knows not from what he is repenting, or from what to be saved by believing.

The Conclusion: May God Grant to His Servants to Trust Him and to Preach His Whole Word

So, neither the truly unconverted person nor the truly converted person is really served well by law-less preaching. God's law is marvelously designed to address both. Without the gospel, it can serve neither very well.

But without the law, neither can the gospel.

Let us trust God, when He says that the law is good (night just right, but good).

O for grace to trust Him more!

Accountability, Christian Friendships, and Holiness that Transcends Behavior

Perhaps fueled by the Sonship movement that was prevalent in the PCA in the 80's and 90's, for a long time it was stressed that Christian men needed accountable friendships --another man to whom they could confess anything, and who would hold them accountable for doing the right thing.

Let me state from the first that I think this is a good thing, albeit a difficult one. Men seem to have difficulty forming fast and intimate friendships, particularly in this age when people move about so much. My closest friends are men I rarely see face to face. I don't like this one bit, but it is the way it is.

Yet, as with everything else, we need to make sure we don't confuse a good thing with being the only thing. A man may successfully avoid the pitfalls of lust and greed and the destruction to which they might lead, may treat his wife and children self-sacrificingly well, and may be a generous tither and a devoted churchman and have regular times of study and prayer and still fall far short of godly manhood.

Far too often we have confused holiness with mere behavior: doing and not doing. Yet, Scripture is filled with warnings about doing without being. What do I mean? The fruits of the spirit are not concrete "doing" things --they can't be defined by an accountability list. How are you doing at the love thing? What about the kindness thing? These are matters of the heart. 1 Cor 13 says we can even give our body to be burned (doing in the extreme) and have it all be in vain because of lovelessness (a being thing).

The Christian life is not an easy thing, and accountability is certainly a useful tool towards holiness. It is not, however, the magic pill. No created thing is. This ought to cause us to rely more upon existential connection with the Holy Spirit, who alone can work his true fruits in our lives.

White Harvest Conference: March 6, 2010

This day there were some Pastors and young men gathered in a building, and what did we hear?  We heard Pastors instructing these young men, eleven total, about the Gospel Ministry.  For myself, it was a good reminder of what I am called to.  Although, I know all the information this conference provided, it was still convicting and encouraging.  Why?  Because the root of this conference and each lecture was in God's Word.  

The schedule for the meeting was the following (Including breaks in between):

1. An Introduction of the attendees and Pastors
2. Session One: Rev. Dr. David Jussely on "The Call to the Gospel Ministry"
3. Session Two: Rev. Mark Smith on "The Work of the Gospel Minister"
4. Explanation of the Ordination Process
5. Session Three: Rev. Rob Hill on "The Piety of the Gospel Minister"
6. Season of Prayer

Each session was spot on for these predominately high school aged students.  Question and Answer times were held following each lecture and the young men seemed to be learning a great deal.  I am most certain that no one left feeling pressured to be called to the Gospel Ministry, but rather left with a greater understanding of and appreciation for Gospel Ministry.  Each young man also left with wisdom on how to proceed from this point, which I believe is answered in 1 Thessalonians 4:3 where we were reminded of as we closed, "For this is the will of God; your sanctification."

These audio lectures will hopefully be available online at a later date (hopefully soon).